Poison Paradise
by SuicidalxLust
Summary: A broken heart, a new love, and a waiting adventure. What's Bella got to lose. Review or there will be no more chapters LEMON explicit read at your own risk and no i mean NO flames.
1. Chapter 1

Hello Readers this is my first fic I hope you like it.

And forewarning if you don't like the outcome of the story don't go flaming it okay? I will not stand for flames I hate it as much as I hate the people that do it. Now, I'm telling you right now the next chapter will depend on the amount of reviews I receive.

NO reviews NO chapter :)

What I do allow thought is helpful critiquing and grammar advice if you see some mistake. I'm all ears for that.

THINGS TO KNOW BEFORE READING:

8888888888: this means flashback

_italics_: thinking(of course I think we all use this)

That's all for now ill probably post more in the future.

Now for the sake of not wanting a lawsuit on my hands and having millions of dollars of being in debt due to being sued here is this.

**DISCLAIMER**: I do NOT own any of Stephanie Meyers books nor will I ever.

Read and ejnoy.

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I was driving my truck thinking about how Edward seemed so distant. His face seemed to be void of emotion. It scared me, I think he's overreacting to the event that only happened last week on my birthday.

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I had just come home from school only to find Edward in my room smiling hugely.

"Happy birthday my angel." He exclaimed.

"I have a surprise for you Bella."

I glared at him. He knew I didn't like surprises, his reaction was simply laughing and pulling me to him. I let myself hit against his cold perfectly sculpted chest. I then felt a vibration coming from his pocket.. He pulled out his cell phone flipping it open. I could hear Alice excitedly squealing on the other line.

"It's ready!"

Edward murmured ok and the next thing I knew, he had thrown me on his back and was jumping off my windowsill onto the ground. His car was in the driveway, my heart jumped at the recognition of the silver Volvo glistening with moisture. He ran me to the car and gently placed me inside. Before I could even blink my eyes we were down the street going about one ten. I tried not to look out the widow at the world whizzing past me. I might have a heart attack if I did. So instead I focused on Edward. His skin was flawless, he had some of his long reddish-brown hair falling over his right eye. His delicious bow shaped lips were slightly parted. He was perfectly breath taking in every way. What did I do to deserve him?

I heaved a sigh causing him to turn towards me. His topaz eyes focused intently on me. His brow was furrowed but his skin still remained flawless.

"What's wrong Bella?" He questioned worriedly.

"Oh nothing I ust wonder what Alice was talking about." was all I could reply.

His mouth curved up in a kind of half smile dazing me and making me forget what I just said.

"You'll see." He purred still holding that crooked breathtaking smile. We stopped at the edge of the forest and got out.

"You ready to ride me?" He whispered seductively in my ear.

For a second I had almost thought that he was implying something completely different than what he meant. I felt a raging blush cover my face as I imagined what it would be like to be with Edward in that way. He leaned in and kissed me lightly since we still had boundaries, with him craving my blood and all. His lips brushed up against mine. Automatically my arms went up around his neck pulling him closer. I desperately wanted to deepen our kiss. He allowed me to put a little more pressure. I parted my lips wanting to invite him in. As soon as I did he pulled away leaving me gasping for air.

"Bella you're too much you know that?" he gasped while shaking has head.

I simply smiled looking innocent. He just rolled his eyes and walked over pulling me onto his back.

"Come on Bella Alice is waiting..." He said matter-of-factly.

"Oh and Bella?"

"Yeah." I responded, my voice sounding childish.

"Please keep an open mind." His eyes held a pleading look.

"I will." I couldn't help but to give in.

We finally came to a stop in front of his family's home, which I hoped would become mine also soon. All I could do was hope, Edward was strongly against making me a vampire. I let another sigh escape me. He gave me another worried look. I smiled up at him than grabbed his hand inter winding my fingers with his.

"Come on Alice is waiting." I said in a mocking voice. He laughed and pulled me along.

We made it up to the porch when a blur of black and white flew in passed us and stopped in front of the door. She had placed her hands on each side of the door frame and blocking our entrance.

"Wait, I want to see your reaction!" she squealed.

"Are you ready?"

"Yes Alice I'm ready, I've been ready." I sarcastically remarked.

"Okay no need for harshness..." Her smiled faltered, but was quickly replaced.

She slowly, but steadily creeped the door open. I felt myself grow impatient. "Today Alice...unlike you guys, I don't have forever." The words came out harshly. I immediately regretted them as soon as they left my mouth. A pained looked crossed Edwards face contorting his perfect features. He still looked gorgeous enough to be a god. The look lingered for a few seconds before disappearing into the calm, collective look he always wore. My heart began to ache.

"_I wish I could be like them already and not have to hurt Edwards feelings every time I say something like this."_

I felt so hopeless.

"And now Isabella Swan, welcome to your surprise Birthday party!!" Alice chimed musically breaking the awkward moment.

All I could do was stand in the doorway and gape with my mouth hanging open. Alice never ceased to amaze me. There were blue and black streamers all along the house hanging from the ceiling, wrapped around poles there were even some on the table legs. I could see blue confetti spread evenly along the beautifully crafted dining table. There was a big black banner hanging from the ceiling that said "Happy Birthday Bella!!" in big blue glittery letters. Edward led me into the kitchen where Carlisle, Esme, jasper, Emmett, and even Rosalie stood waiting.

"Surprise Bella!!!"

They all they all exclaimed in unison. I felt tears well up in my eyes as I saw a cake in their hands. The cake was huge. It had to be at least two feet wide, and it looked about three inches tall. I stepped closer to get a better look. The icing was navy blue with black around the border. In the center was a picture of me and Edward together smiling happily. A long the top of the cake in black icing it read.

"Happy 18th Birthday Bella we all love you."

I looked up at each one of their faces saving Edwards for last.

"Thank you, thank you all, I'm glad to be here. I love all of y'all too, I feel like I'm almost apart of the family." My voice was thick with emotion.

"Bella you are apart of this family, you are my daughter in every way." Esme stepped in with her eyes shining down at me full of pride and love.

"Yeah Bella, you're the bestest friend and sister I could ever ask for." Alice piped up.

"Besides who else would we watch fall flat on their face," Emmet snorted, everyone laughed.

"I know we don't really much but I still see you as family so don't worry about feeling like it because you are whether you want to or not. Your stuck with us now." jasper said with laughing joyful eyes.

That was the most I had ever heard jasper say at one time and it caught me off guard. He always seemed so distant, but that was only because he was adjusting to being a "vegetarian". I was overcome with emotion I was pretty much crying.

"Really, thank you everyone, you have no idea how much this means to me." I bawled.

Edward pulled me closer to him holding me tightly. That's when I realized that Rosalie hadn't said anything. When I looked back up I noticed her looking down and kind of shuffling her feet. I quickly brushed it aside and focused back on the party.

"What are you gonna do with all of this cake! I couldn't possibly eat all of this by myself!" I exclaimed. They all just shrugged their shoulders and laughed. Alice disappeared and reappeared in an instant with a lighter in one hand and candles in the other. She easily placed the candles in the exact center of the cake. The candles were black and blue stripped numbers, one was the number one, and the other was the number eight. They were placed side by side to form the number eighteen in the middle of my cake.

"Make a wish!" Alice sang as she was lighting the candles. I took a few steps forward being careful not to trip. I closed my eyes making my wish.

"_I wanted more than anything for Edward to make me a vampire." _

I fluttered my eyes back open and blew the candles out. Alice started cheering and clapping like crazy. Everyone turned towards her and just started shaking their heads. It was still hard not to smile when Alice was like this. I found myself laughing and having a great time. After I ate a piece of my cake we all sat in the living room and chatted. We just talked about anything and everything.

"So Bella what do you think of all this" Carlisle questioned.

"oh I really like it all. You guys do so mu-"

"Present time!" Alice squealed.

I had been so distracted by Carlisle that I hadn't even noticed Alice leave. I turned around to see a pile of colorful boxes stacked neatly. I rushed over to start opening the pretty presents. First was Esme's present. I was so excited that I wasn't being careful. I sliced my finger and watched the blood ooze out.

"No!" I heard Edward exclaim.

I watched as he slammed hard into jaspers chest as he fought Edward to get to me. His eyes were black, glittery gems coldly placated in his face. I was terrified. I had never seen so much hate emanating from his eyes. Jasper managed to break free and dove for me. I could see him inches from my tiny, helpless form. I turned to Edward and mouthed that I was sorry. At that moment I felt the impact of cold, hard stone followed by a loud crash . I felt a stinging sensation In my neck. Almost like my skin was being peeled off. I let out an agonizing scream. The outside of my neck felt like it was on fire. My head started throbbing and a wave of nausea swept over me as I smelt my own blood. I cringed my nose at the iron, salty smell. I could hear Edwards voice frantically screaming my name. His voice sounded strained from controlling his thirst.

"I'm so sorry Bella, I shouldn't have brought you!" He mumbled hoarsely. I wanted to reach out and tell him it wasn't his fault, but I seemed to be paralyzed and noises were fading away. Finally it was silent.

I slowly blinked open my eyes.

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"_Did I die?"_ I thought.

And that's chapter one,

Thank you for reading please review.

I mean PLEASE PLEASE REVIEW, cause remember if there are no reviews there is no chapter two.

Thank you hoped you liked it. :)


	2. AN PLEASE READ IMPORTANT

Hello people,

This is October Val's sister, I've been typing her story up and posting it online since she can't use her own at the moment and for those of you that have been reviewing and reading and might just now started reading this story I kinda have some bad news, it's only temporary though so don't worry too much.

1. Me and my sis have mid-terms next week, and we have long ass reviews like you can't imagine and need to study, BADLY!

2. I'm getting tile put in my house so I need to remove all furniture and so that means unhooking everything in the house, sooo that means no computer for me for at least a week.

3. I'm not done typing the rest of CH. 2 due to the fact that I have my own stories and so therefore haven't had a lot of time to finish hers.

So if there are 10 reviews and I haven't posted yet I am deeply sorry that you have to wait but please, please be patient. Again I can't express how sorry I am but for those who have been reviewing thank you again.


	3. Chapter 2

Thank you so much for the reviews they are MUCH loved...and even though there arent 10 reviews me and my sis are feeling generous (note the sarcasm) because her birthday is com

ing up so those of you who have been dying to read and have been waiting here you go :)

Disclaimer: I do NOT own any of Stephanie Meyers books nor will I ever

now on with the story I know your all dying to read

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**STILL IN** **FLASHBACK MODE**

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"_Did I die?" _I thought.

I was lying in a white hospital bed with all kinds of tubes and wires connected to me. On my left was a heart monitor, and on my right was an IV bag filled with blood. I dragged my eyes to the edge of the bed where Edward was sitting. He had a cold, emotionless expression on his face. His eyes were completely distant. I tried to turn my head but my neck stung. I let out a low, quiet whimper. Edwards' head snapped up but his face remained emotionless.

"Edward." I quietly whispered his name.

For a split second his eyes read torture, then the look quickly disappeared into impassiveness.

"I'm sorry Bella." His voice was monotonous.

"It's-not...your...fault." I breathed wincing after every word.

Edwards face still remained in tact, portraying nothing.

"Well, ow, what happened?"

I was feeling nervous from his unresponsiveness. There was a flicker of emotion across his face then it was gone before I could comprehend what it was. His eyes grew more distant, he looked deep in thought. He took his time answering me.

"Well...you cut your finger and started bleeding, and since jasper is still trying to adjust to his diet, couldn't stay in control; he lost it and dove for you.

Then I caught him but he broke free, Alice tackled you and I caught him again knocking a glass bowl in the process in which you fell in the shattered pieces. It cut your neck pretty badly and you lost quite a bit of blood."

A haunted look crept over his features then slowly dissipated.

"Charlie and Rene are here, I'll be going now." He said plainly as if the words didn't matter.

"Rene's here?" I asked shocked.

"Yeah, bye Bella." He turned and left just like that.

I watched him leave with my mouth hanging open betraying my emotions. Once he was gone, I could hear Carlisle's voice speaking to my parents.

"...yes...she is right this way. She fell pretty hard but nothing too serious. She has a bandage around her neck that needs to remain on for at least a week, once the wound begins to heal. Good thing it was such a clean cut, it will heal faster that way."

Charlie, Rene, and Carlisle walked in. I could see regret in Carlisle's eyes, like he was about to do something he shouldn't. I grew worried, Charlie and Rene looked relived to see me awake.

"Hey Bells, how are you feeling?" Charlie asked with pure concern.

"I'm fine dad, really, I feel better." My voice was hoarse from pain and sleep.

"I want to go home."

Both Charlie and Rene looked to Carlisle for an answer.

"She should be ready within five hours." With that he bowed his head and left the room.

"I'm sorry honey, I have to go." Rene looked wistfully at me then added "I'll call later kay." She leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead.

Of course she has to go. Phil needs her...i grew irritated as I watched her leave. Charlie looked at me with an apologetic look.

"Bells I gotta go, they need me at work, there are reports of bears in the woods." There was regret in his voice.

"I'll be back later to take you home."

"K." I mumbled.

I lay there wondering if Edward was gonna come back since Charlie was gone. All I could do was wonder because he still hadn't shown up. I gazed steadily at the ceiling. Memorizing it's every crack and contour. Eventually I fell asleep.

Dream sequence

_I was in the forest running around helplessly. I was looking for something but I didn't know what. Then I heard a voice I could never fail to recognize. _

"_Bella...come here." Edward whispered to me._

_I started running towards his outstretched arms. Every step I took seemed to make him farther. I kept on running desperately knowing I would trip over something and he would be lost to me. Tears of frustration began forming in my eyes because no matter how fast I ran I couldn't catch him. _

_I tripped over a rock and fell. Edwards form kept drifting away. I tried to scream his name to beg him __not to go but nothing would come out of my mouth. _

"_Goodbye my Bella." His voice faded away into the darkness leaving on my knees alone._

I awoke screaming. I looked around to find that I was in my room. I was about to question whether at was all a dream, but a sharp stinging sensation on my bandaged neck told me other wise.

Just then Charlie came bursting in.

"Bells you okay!?" His voice sounded frantic and concerned.

"Yeah dad I'm fine, just a nightmare." I murmured.

"Oh." He breathed relived.

"Well I guess I'll be going back to bed. You sure you don't need anything?"

"No dad I'm fine, I'm gonna try and go back to sleep." My voice was still jumbled from sleep.

"Alright, night Bells." With that he closed my door.

I let out a sigh and plopped my head back on my pillow trying to piece my dream together. What if Edward really left? I immediately denied that would ever happen. Edward cared about me too much. A lead weight of dread fell into the pit of my stomach as I realized Edward wasn't here.

Maybe something came up, or maybe they had to do something with jasper. I tried to calm my nerves by thinking in the morning when Edward would pick me up from school. I looked at my clock, which read eleven thirty pm, while wincing in pain. I breathed a sigh of contentment and let myself drift to back into sleep.

I awoke the next morning disoriented. I groaned and fell back on my pillow. Yay, it's Monday, well at least I get to see Edward. I threw myself out of my bed, and willed myself to go into the bathroom. I brushed my teeth and fought my hair with a brush until it was finally tamed. I half expected to see Edward in my room on my rocking chair, but with the way he was yesterday i highly doubted he'd be there. I opened my door and let out a surprised 'oh' seeing I was alone. A wave of panic swept through me. It was hard to breathe.

"_He wouldn't leave, would he?"_

I took deep breaths trying to calm my nerves, which were going haywire. I shakily walked over to my window and looked in my driveway. As I expected Charlie's cruiser wasn't there. The panic threatened to overtake me again. Yet again I shook off. I figured Edward wasn't coming so I decided I would drive to school. I started heading down the stairs when I missed a step and slipped. I landed on my bottom . It was weird falling and actually hitting the ground. I had grown so use to my guardian angel catching me before I hit. I felt tears well up in my eyes at the thought of him not being here.

Where was he?

A chill ran up my spine, what if he really did leave? The tears were on the verge of overflowing. I swallowed hard and stepped out of my front door. I walked to my truck in a daze.

I didn't remember driving to school I just looked up and saw I was there. I got out and heard the bell ring. I bolted to my first period class and made it just in time. As I walked into the class my eyes immediately narrowed on the empty desk next to mine. Normally this desk would be occupied by Edwards godly form which was nowhere to be seen. The panic rose and breathing became difficult.

"Hey Bella you all right?" Mike Newton asked with concern.

"Where's Edward?" He asked curiously.

"I-I'm fine, uummm I don't know where Edward is-i think he had a family emergency." I stammered my voice thick from fighting the tears that were overfilling my eyes.

"Oh." He muttered disappointed.

"If you need anything just let me know okay? I'm here for you." He assured me.

"Yeah." Yeah I mumbled.

With that he turned and went back to his seat. Class passed by slowly, I hadn't paid attention to a single thing that had happened. When the bell finally rang I got up and dragged myself to my next class. That's how the rest of my day went, I grew more and more depressed. When lunch time came I paused before I went into the cafeteria. I took a deep breath than stepped in. I got in line just grabbing whatever not caring what I got. When I got out of line I looked towards the Cullen table and very nearly dropped my tray.

It was completely empty.

It was cloudy so they had no reason not to come but than again the whole jasper thing. I brushed it off and went to go sit at the table by myself. By then I wasn't hungry anymore so just dumped my trays contents when the bell rang ending lunch. The rest of my day was agonizing, I didn't even bother to participate in gym, I couldn't concentrate. Finally the last bell rang and I shuffled to my truck. I drove home slowly, pondering what could have happened.

When I arrived at Charlie's house, I still couldn't call it my home, I got out of my truck and headed straight to the kitchen. I decided I would try something new. It would help keep my mind occupied. I took down some chicken breasts from the freezer and left them to thaw. In the meantime I started cooking some rice. I put in tomato sauce after the rice had browned adding water to make it soup like. I put in a lot of pepper, some regular salt and a small bit of garlic salt. By then the chicken breast had thawed so I cut them up into small strips and pieces. I moved the rice into a pot and threw the chicken pieces in there. I covered the pot and left it to simmer stirring it and adding water when needed.

As soon as I finished dinner, Charlie walked in hanging his gun.

"Mmmm...what is that your cooking Bells? It smells delicious." Charlie commented sniffing the air.

"It's rice with chicken. I saw it in a recipe book and decided to try it." I stated.

"Oh well it smells delicious." He breathed while walking over to get a helping.

We both sat down eating and chatting about how our day went. I edited the part about the Cullens not being there, and me feeling empty. Charlie got up to get seconds and I told him I was feeling tired so I went up to my bedroom. I didn't bother hurrying I figured Edward wouldn't be there. As I expected my room was empty. I sighed heavily and grabbed my bag of toiletries. I lumbered over to the bathroom and got in the shower. I let the hot water calm me down and massage my body. When the hot water was running out I got out and into the black silk pajamas that Alice got me. I had to give her credit, they were comfortable. I crawled int my bed and cried myself to sleep. The rest of the week had pretty much gone like that Monday, the Cullen's never showed up. Each day the passed it got to me more and more. Yesterday I finally decided that I would go to their house and ask what was going on.

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I was snapped out of my memory by the recognition of the little part in the trees that would lead me to the Cullens' house. I parked my truck and got out. The entire way walking I kept mumbling to myself that I was probably overreacting. Finally I came upon the house that I became familiar with. I was confused. Normally one of the family would be out here to greet me. I walked up to the door and for the first time I knocked. No answer, I knocked again; still no answer. The panic I was keeping at bay was unleashed and overwhelming me. I began to hyperventilate and I started shaking. Slowly with a trembling hand I turned the doorknob and swung the door open. I was surprised to find everything still there and in place. The house felt vacant.

"Edward? Alice? Somebody?" I yelled into the empty shell. I could hear an edge in my voice. On reaction my body started to move towards the room I could find blindfolded. I walked in, It took a few seconds to sink in where I was. My head turned frantically now bandage free. A white spot on Edwards royal blue blue bed sheets caught my eye. I hesitantly stepped over and recognized it as a letter. I picked it up seeing that it was addressed to me, and began to read it;

_Isabella, _

I was Edwards handwriting,

_We have been together quite a while now. The incident that happened on your birthday has brought me down to earth about what I really am and how dangerous my family and I are, and can be. I find that I do not feel as strongly for you as I thought I did. The love I thought I felt for you has now evaporated now that my clouded mind has been cleared. I am sorry that everything has come to this and please forgive me. My family has left forks to make it easier for you to let us go. You are still human and your mind is like a sleeve. It shouldn't be long until you have completely forgotten about us and moved on to live a normal life. Again I apologize for this inconvenience. Goodbye Isabella and thank you for your friendship. _

_Edward Anthony _

_Masen Cullen _

I stood there staring at the letter not comprehending what he meant. Then it sank in.

"He-doesn't..love-me?"

I heard myself say aloud. My voice sounded broken. For a moment I felt numb, then I felt like my heart had been ripped and yanked from my chest with no regret it would cause me. My stomach felt like it was being twisted. I toppled over and scrunched up into a fetal position clutching my chest and stomach. Sobs tore through me. I lay there till I couldn't cry anymore shaking and in pain. Finally in what felt like days but was only hours, the pain numbed over and my dry sobs stopped. I pulled myself and gripping on to Edwards bedpost. I didn't dare look around as I walked out to my truck for fear that I would be impaired again. I felt light-headed, like I wasn't in my body. I shifted my truck into drive and went home. I looked at the clock to see that it was five 'o' clock in the afternoon. I had been there for nine hours. There was a pang in my chest as I thought about it. I shook my head as if trying to shake out the thoughts in there.

After clearing my mind I noticed that Charlie wasn't home. I took out fish from the refrigerator and began to fry it. Charlie came home got a plate and went to go watch a game on the television. I went up the stairs and stopped in front of my room. I was afraid of what I would see If I went in, or in better words wouldn't see. I brushed it off and steadily opened the door. The vacancy was torture. There will no longer be an angel to light up my world. There will no longer be a guardian to catch me when I fall. My reason to live was gone, leaving me with my will to survive. I threw myself onto my bed and drifted to sleep.

Days turned into weeks.

Weeks turned into months.

I had become an empty shell. A body but no spirit. Sure I ate, I would sleep, and if you asked me a question I would answer, but no more than that. My life became a schedule. Eat, shower, sleep (sometimes), wake up, go to school, come home and cook dinner; it was like a cycle. I would keep having the same dream I had in the hospital and I would wake up screaming. I became so regular that Charlie stopped coming into my room. I drifted away from my friends and became a loner. It had been a little more than one year since he left. I couldn't even think his name or pain would paralyze me. I woke up. I was yet another day. I got up went to the bathroom, brushed my teeth, and pulled on some clothes. I went downstairs to get a bowl of cereal. Charlie had already left for work. After I finished eating I rinsed my bowl and left it in the sink. I walked to my truck got in and drove to school. It seemed like it would be just another day. I sat at a table by myself until the bell rang. I shuffled into my class and plopped into my seat at the back of the class. No one even bothered acknowledging me anymore. As I far as they were concerned I was a lost cause. Due to my having infinite time, to an extent, I was making A's in all my classes. I was sitting in my desk waiting for another day to begin when someone arrived. Everyone turned towards the door in amazement.

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Thank you very much again for the reviews :) 


	4. AN: Sorry Guys

**AUTHORS NOTE:** Sorry guys

Hey guys im sosososo sorry for not typing on this story but I have had major major writers block on this one and no matter how many times I type it it just doesn't seem to end right sooo im sadly giving up on this story but I will be working on another story which I will be updating frequently im working on the first couple of chapters and will be posting them soon. Thank you for being so patient with the story even though its only a few chapters but the next one should hopefully be one you can enjoy again I'm sorry about the delay, apologies Val


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